Agent-of-Chaos

Alright, how long has it been since updated this hunkajunka? A year?

Probably.

Anyway, important announcement, so perk your ears, park your rears and feel the flouride sting of me pissed off about something totally unrelated.

What's the fudge is up with deviantART?

Ask yourself that, look around this website and see what it's about.  

Pageviews? Fanbases? Print Sale Statistics? Admin/Subscirber Status?  

I've been here five decent years, and have made tremendous improvement in my artwork (namely, mah art looks like the things they look like). And any improvement in my art and status as an artists has had ABSOLUTELY NOTHING TO DO WITH deviantART.

I came back here this week to look at dA and I finally saw it for what it was. A website originally created as a stomping for a circle of artists who were also the founders, and there's nothing wrong with that. But when it turned into a profitable business that uses favortism, and cockbull reasoning (which heavily relies on the popularity of the involved parties) to settle domestic disputes. It's like a pet dog that you adopt as a puppy, it's really cute. But as it grows older, the poop gets bigger and it starts doing unspeakable things to your furniture.  

But I can't hold the admins/website owners/art monkey overseers responsible for how crappy this place has gotten; somebody has to make money off it. Viva Free Enterprise!

The problem lies with us, the users. Who joined this joint under the influence of the idea that doing so would get us somewhere in the art field.  

How wrong I was to think that.

I see dA, as a concentration of fetish artists, fanservice providers, whiners, wannabes, unoriginality, and me. The cancer that is killing the world of online art communities. Putting your work here will accomplish NOTHING. If any of y'all actually want to go somewhere with your art work, you have to actually DO STUFF. Like go to Art School. Get internships. Starting putting your stuff out there in the real world media. Make portfolios. Etcetera, etcetera.  

Which is what I've been doing as of late, busting my buns to get work done for class, going out to gallery openings and talking with professional artists. And all of them agreed, that putting your artwork in here, on the web, will get nothing done for you.

But what about prints and online stores where I can sellz my sh*tz!!!!??!?!?!?!?!??!?!?!???!111/1/1

If you want to make money, I'm not gonna stop you. Just keep in mind that the world of merchandise is a gamble. How the hell do you even know that ANYONE will buy your stuff? Is the chance worth taking? And keep in mind of middleman fees that exist in dA print accounts and cafepress shopkeep accounts. The price tag might say the costumer will pay a fiver for that shirt you designed, but how much of a cut goes to the middle man? And is the price good enough to cover expenses for making the merch?  

If any of y'all want to go into the business side of art - take some business classes. Just cause dA and cafepress dumb down the process don't mean it's the easier road.  

But what about your 4we50me k0//1k5? 1 //33d //r3 //1//15!!!!

What about my comics? What about Nimis?  

Sorry kids, the motivation's not there anymore. And it's not like it was worth the effort. How much was I making a page? zilch. How much did I make off of merchandise. Whatever MaskDT paid for that thong. And while selling thongs is a sacred cause, it's not worth it at the moment. I got other stuff to focus on, like college.  

50 y00r ju57 qu1771//g?

More or less, I'm quitting the dA scene. I'm gonna start working on building a reputation in the real world.  

In short, I'm quitting dA. Buh bye!

I might come back in a while with a suprise. But don't get your hopes up.

If any of y'all want to take me to internet court over anything I've said in this journal, talk to my man with the red tie: www.amren.com/mtnews/archives/…

Peace and love,
this guy

it sucks not having whatever the hell humans need to summon that creative principle.  

"AN 87 year old man was arrested today for exposing himself to minors. He is pending trial for assault with a dead weapon".

and for anyone who thinks I'm just being whiny at this point, to them I say that they can go soak their head. I'm not whiny cause I'm frickin' pissed off.

I WANT to draw Islands of Paradise again. I WANT to tell the story.

But for some reason, whether is be psychological, physiological, or emotional, I just CAN'T.

and it's pissing me off.

It's been near a year now.

*EDIT*

it's never easy when you have to bury the good ones.

To all GMU students: Brian "Big Gay Brian" Patone is dead. He died last night.

Good night sweet prince.

I'm going to move into the literary medium for a while.

I will write a book.

EDIT:   

Where's my art? It's in my head. And anyone who calsl themself an artist should know about artist block. I've got a 10000kilo block lodged somewhere in my cortex, it's going to be a while before I can move it.

I should probably explain what the book is:  

Firechild Studios presents - THE SUICIDE DIARIES

It's easy for doctors to give me a complex, or say that this mental archetype can be rooted to this -  but even with 16-20 years of education to get a Doctrine of Philosophy (Ph. D) for psychiatry, psychology, or psychotherapy, it's still no garuntee that you're right. And with the large amounts of people depending on some form of pill or therapy, it sickens me how weak people seem depending on people they pay to talk to or sedate them up to eyes balls with prozac.  

So I guess a more accurate title would be:

"THE SUICIDE DIARIES - A Reflection by a Mood-Disordered Psychotic on What Makes Him a Mood-Disordered Psychotic and The General Estimate of the Human Mental Health Situation."

In short, I'm going to write a book, psychoanalyzing myself and how my condition relates to the mental health of the rest of Terran society.  

Don't know how long it'll take. Will upload snippets now and then.  
  

PEACE,
Dan M.

Why am I still alive?

Anyway, not much to report.

Marc Emery is in custody, awaiting orders for extradition to the States.

I think I've discovered a new type of mental illness.

Hypercognitive Acitivity Disorder.

and I think I have it.

Some of you might say, "Wayt, dunt yoo meen eh-dee-ech-dee?"

If it was ADHD, it wouldn't be a problem. I'd just have my shrinks hook me up with some aderol and I'd be like the other side of the pillow.

But no.

Hypercognitive Activity Disorder, makes people think too much, too quickly. Overloading the brain with mixed thoughts, causing mixed emotions, causing mixed emotional responses, and causes an overload of chemical reactions, essentially driving the person to the edge of insanity until they stop thinking, the steam blows out their ears, and the brain cools down and resets.  

I think too much.  

Some Thoughts on Reality, Religion, and Quantum Mechanics.

All particles are waves, unless observed. This was proven by the double slit experiement. When scientists fired electrons at a plate with two slits in it and didn't observe what happened, the electrons started out as particles, became waves, and created an interference pattern that is only seen with waves.

Confused, the team tried it again and decided to measure what happened, throwing in the element of observation. When observed, the electrons started out as particles and remained particles. They repeated this experiment until they finally concluded that:

All particles are waves unless observed.

So the fact that we see a table, means that the particles that make up a table stop being waves and become particles.  

Our minds define the universe.  

But if you close your eyes, does a table cease it's particular nature and become waves?

It's debatable. You can reach out to it and feel it eventually. We could conclude that either observance is also possible with other senses, or that there is a larger consciousness that observes the universe and makes it retain it's particle nature. Or neither. Or both.  

But supposing there is a higher consciousness that observes the universe, then why did the electrons in the double slit experiment cease being particles and become waves. They could only do that if nothing was there to observe them. Which could either mean that there is no higher, larger, consciousness, or that this larger consciousness understands the wave nature of particles and simply abides by that, which lets the electron particles become waves. Which might argue that this larger consciousness is a consciousness that acts in a similar way to our consciousness. Which in tail might argue that something made us (or we made it) in its (or our) own likeness. And that we are the powers that create and destroy the universe. We are all Brahman, Vishnu, and Shiva.  

All of us are Purusha, the sacrifice that was sacrificed, TO the sacrifice (the Purushashukta). The lamb that was forsaken by the god for the sinners, who are also the god that judged themselves and the lamb they are sacrificing themselves as.  

Perhaps each of us is a god, and maybe the goal of life is not to be more godlike. For when humans become godlike, they are hedonistic, greedy, and self-decievering. Perhaps the goal of life is to be less human. For when a god is less human, he is more sacred than he is profane.  

So stop paying devotion and reverence to a god you don't believe in, and give that time and effort to one you love.